Wrath of Pearl
by Wario the TableMan
Summary: Cortez has fallen. As has Goombella. Vivian is enraged. George is here.


"Stop it, George," cried Vivian, readying the magic wand. She would soon obliterate the cruel enforcer of antagonism towards the holiday season.

George wept. "You do not comprehend this soul-searching duty that I have been given, do you?"

Vivian was so totally offended by the negativity inside the gruesome head of George. "George, I totes defy your liking behaviour towards the grandeur of this blessed season. Halt your evils!"

"It is not an evil!" cried George. He reached into his backpack, withdrew two soiled canollis. "Oh sweet tooks!" he said with the mightiest tears tearing down his cheeks like a torn cheek. He was feeling the gashes of Christmas bring abysmal misconceptions into his domain of servitude to the greater good.

"Why do you have severe dislike, George?" asked Vivian, charging the powerful stick of power. She was not going to take "no" for an answer, not after what had happened to her beloved Cortez.

"Santa is a total wisher of doom. I must defeat his doom-bringing!" explained George.

Bobbery and Goombella entered the living room where the two otherworldly warriors were engaged in their tousle. "What's all this then?" asked Bobbery, shouting like he had just seen the last episode of Agents of Shield with his posse and his mother. This was actually a true occurrence because I saw this happen twice, once on my Apple TV and once on my Apple Watch.

"Hey, George," said Goombella. "Do not do..."

"I must," said George. He struck Goombella down.

Goombella died that day at the ripe old age of Neon'+. She was buried in Berkshire next to the statue of the crayon museum who bought ownership of the turkey sandwich factory.

Squidward looked through his hot spyglass at George's righteous rear. "What George has done is all going exactamundo to da plan, homes," said the cephalopod with his tea-sipping lips adourning the fine china.

"That is a serious threat to the livelihood, eh?" said Papyrus as he cooked Spaghetti for Squidward's octopus yearnings.

Squidward ate the noodles with so much power that even super rap superstar Super Kanye saw it from his Mercedes and bought SpongeBob's inheritance for two bucks.

"TWO BUCKS!" said Mr. Krabs. He wiped his brow with his pink handkerchief. He wrung it out and turned to his darling daughter Pearl. "Aye, we are not giving any more money to that yellow frycook I own..."

Pearl was so mad at her father. She flew with her patent-pending Whale Wings all the way to Rogueport. She met with the legendary ghost gal Vivian and her friends. Unfortunately, two friends were completely daisy-pushing: Goombella and Cortez.

"Cortez was my husband," said Vivian tearfully. "I loved Goombella like a true sister. She and I went to Scandinavia and participated in goose-wrangling for twenty-five years!"

Everyone else wept. Mario did not because his feet hurt.

"K0, jj.. 4323 BG 868 but, "lane" ?! You"re, GGs 2lon. Hnn?" asked Pearl.

Vivian nodded. She saw the fiery determination in the whale teen's marvelous eyes. She thought about how grand life was when her friends were still in the realm of the living.

"I don't understand why George did these hurtful objections to Christmas," said Luigi. "It is as if he is a mega Thanos archtype."

"Indeed," said Yoshi. He combed his hair with his comb and tossed an egg at Wario, who caught the shell in his mouth and digested the succulence. Yoshi grinned sassily at the camera and flew back to Richmond for merchandise purposes.

"I cannot stand this Christmas mistrust," said Bowser. He cried into his pillow, the one with the picture of Master Shifu on it. That was the Koopa King's favourite pillow of all time. He loved Master Shifu's wise voice and award-winning role in the hit movie Dreamwork's Kung-Fu Panda for the Sega Dreamcast.

"Yo," said Wonky. He had some knowledge tidbits to sell for a modest price.

"Do not sell me products," said Mario. He got a decent pistol and shot the stained glass windows of the cathedral. He jumped through like a true hero and ran out into the streets, decisively making himself scarce before the police showed up and asked their deadly questions.

"Oh gosh..." said Luigi with a very dreadful essence slithering amid his green being. "The police force... I do believe they mayhaps be a part of George's heinous scheme!"

Everyone gasped. This could very well be a very solid truth, more solid than my abs.

**MERRY CHRISTMAS**

**FINANCIAL**

**MM5**


End file.
